I acknowledge my elders who have gone before me to clear the path I walk today. Some days I wonder why me!

No one ever achieved greatness by staying comfortable. We all have a comfort zone we love being in. It’s nice and safe and we rein supreme. The only problem with it is that to grow and learn and achieve our potential and all that we can become, we have to step outside that comfort zone and push ourselves.

Our bodies are so amazing. I’m not sure if you have ever stopped and thought about it, and maybe I have too much time on my hands, but I have thought about it a lot lately and I’ve figured out something pretty amazing.

Whenever you get uncomfortable and do something that pushes you into that uncomfortable zone, your body compensates you for it. Think about it for a minute.

You undertake a new exercise routine, or you step up into a higher position at work, or you try an activity that you haven’t done before, you get really nervous and it feels pretty uncomfortable. But after you have completed the activity that made you nervous, your body releases a chemical called endorphins and it makes you feel better.

It’s like your body says congratulations, you have made the next step, and because of that, you are now not only able to undertake the task you attempted, but you also get a little feeling of being high and happy, and you feel great about yourself. That’s pretty amazing.

Now I don’t know about you, but I think that we sometimes stay far too long in that comfort zone and we don’t even bother trying to attempt something new. We as a people have overcome so many adversities, we are living proof of what we can achieve when we have to. Imagine what we could achieve if we jumped before we were pushed? How often would we get that great feeling of endorphins in our blood?

It is well documented that if you don’t move when you are suppose to, the universe, or God or the old people, or the fairies, or whatever you believe, will push you and they will move you to where you need to be.

Sometimes we hold onto the very thing that “they” are trying to move us away from. Why is that? Why are we so afraid to stretch ourselves and grow?

So many people stay in jobs they hate, or in relationships that aren’t healthy, but what is the alternative? You need to ask yourself is it worth trading your life for because that is what you are doing. Every day that you go to a job that you hate, you are trading a piece of your life for that job. Or you are trading a piece of your life for that pay cheque at the end of the week. Is it worth it?

So what are your options? You could stay where you are, unhappy and dissatisfied with life, or you can get uncomfortable, move, change or do something different. What is your life and happiness worth to you?

It is my belief that the quality of your life is determined by the questions you ask yourself, and the honest answers you give. If your not happy, then ask why, and then do something about it.

I know what that uncomfortable feeling is like. It’s pretty much been my whole life. I’ve stayed in jobs I hated just for the money. Each day a little piece of my soul was lost, and the light went out a little more in my eyes. I was so unhappy.

So I got really uncomfortable and made a change.

In some areas of my life, I didn’t make the change, I was pushed. My old people knew what was right for me before I did. And even though I dug my heels in thinking I knew best. They wouldn’t take no for an answer. So they pushed me. And I’m thankful everyday.

On the days when I don’t think I have the strength to follow my dreams, or when things are pretty tough, I talk to them. I tell them how I feel and it always seems better. I know they have more wisdom than I do. I’m not that arrogant to think that I know it all. I could be here for a few lifetimes and still not know as much as they do.

We are a spiritual race of people, then why don’t we call on that spirit when we need it most. Our connection to our culture and country isn’t there for lip service. Or maybe for some people it is. But not for me and my family.

I’m so proud to call on my people to help me through. My aunties who walk with me everyday and help me when it is really time for me to step out of my comfort zone and take a leap that I really don’t want to take. Or when I want to but I’m really afraid.

But as I said at the beginning, no one ever achieved greatness by staying comfortable. And I’m not talking about greatness in terms of taking over the world – unless that is your dream, in which case, go for it!!

Your greatness may be the kind words you say to your kids, or stepping up for that job you really wanted to apply for but didn’t think you could even throw your hat in the ring for, let alone win. It’s about what greatness is to you. It’s what makes your heart smile.

Trust me, when your heart smiles, it not just yours alone, it’s the hearts of our ancestors rejoicing in their strength that comes through you.

There are no failures, only experiences you learn from.

Don’t sit on the sidelines of life because you are afraid of being out of your comfort zone. We have been spectators for too long now. Your life is happening to you whether you are aware of it or not. You might as well do what makes you happy and grow and learn in the process.

Why? Because you are so worth it!

I acknowledge my elders who have gone before me to clear the path I walk today. I am who I am because of you and I will be forever grateful for your courage and strength.

As I sit and write this article from my home in Canberra, I occasionally glance out the window and see the bare branches sway in rhythm with the wind. A stark reminder that winter is almost here. Then it got me thinking about the seasons and how similar they are to our plight in Australia.

For thousands of years, the seasons have been the same. Winter always comes right after autumn. Spring always follows winter. We don’t have to wonder if it’s going to be right on time because we just know that is where it is in the cycle. How wonderful that spring follows winter. It couldn’t come in a better place. Try and imagine spring before winter.

I don’t know why the seasons come that way, I wasn’t involved in those early decisions, but I guess someone decided that the way things are is how they are suppose to be.

Then I started thinking how similar it is to us and our challenges. How long are we going to be in the winter of our lives? The constant struggle against government and policies keeps us bound by the winter blues. Fighting against what is, is pointless. We know that those involved in Indigenous affairs get burnt out because of it.

Now I don’t have all the answers, nor do I pretend to. I do know however that what I need to change is within my power. I can’t change what goes on outside, but I can change what happens inside me. I don’t wish for my problems to be easier, I wish for me to be stronger. I don’t wish for less challenges, I wish for more courage to be able to face them. I don’t wish for the struggle of winter to stop, I wish for the skill to help me to get through to spring.

What is the winter of your life right now? What are you struggling against that is pointless to change from the outside?

For woman, one of the biggest struggles we face is domestic and family violence (among other things). We wish for things to be different. We fight against breaking up our family and leaving the situation. We struggle to understand why this is happening to me. We try and figure out what we did to make him so angry.

Violence is about anger and control, it’s never about love. I have spoken to young girls who think it is so sweet that their boyfriends gets jealous of them talking to other guys, so that must mean he really loves me. I remind them that love has nothing to do with it.

Any man who abuses you in any way, shape or form does not love you. Now you can gloss it up however you like. I don’t care how good the make up sex is. If someone loves you they protect you and never allow anyone to harm you, and that means they don’t harm you either.

Which brings me to the grants that Linda Burney has provided to football teams to support men to speak out about violence against woman. I wonder if those $5000 grants wouldn’t be better spent on women’s shelters and short term emergency accommodation for woman and children who are brave enough to escape the violence in the first place.

If women were empowered to know that anyone who hits you does not love you, men would have no one to victimise. If women in the community spoke out about those in their family who are abusing women, the veil would be lifted.

There are men in my family who abuse their wives. I use the term men very loosely because I don’t believe them to be men, they are cowards who cannot control their anger and they take it out on those who cannot defend themselves. I don’t speak to them. I don’t associate with them. I don’t want my son to be around those types of adults. I don’t consider them family.

Now for those that know me, and those who have read my column before, you would know that I’m very respectful. I was brought up with absolute respect for those who are older than me, especially my uncles. But you get from me the respect you deserve, and my uncles who do this deserve no such respect.

My statements here are pretty strong, and you are entitled to disagree. I have been through domestic violence so I speak from experience. Out of respect for my mother who reads this article, I wont go into details because she does not know about the particulars, but I have been through it all.

It was the longest winter. I suffered in that winter for a few years, then I made the decision to leave, and slowly I caught a glimpse of spring. It was not easy, and I don’t pretend it was. But it was certainly worth it.

What is the winter of your life that your in right now? Are you ready to prepare for spring? Remember that Spring always comes after winter. Then you can really enjoy your summer. I wish you well.

I would like to acknowledge my elders. I would like to acknowledge my old people who have gone before me to clear the path I walk today. I believe the time is coming to step up and do what I have been chosen to do. With all the respect I have for myself and my culture, I ask for guidance. It is time.

It has been an interesting concept, the notion of a conversation around the 26th January. I would much prefer to have conversations around topics like Responsibility and Respect. Not in the meaning of expecting other people in Australia to give us respect or accept responsibility, but for us to do this first.

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Sometimes you can plan and over plan and re plan to the point it gets ridiculous. There comes a point when you have to put the planning to the test. You have done the preparation which is great, but if you don’t actually put it into action, then its just a waste of paper. Decide today that whatever you have been planning for, you will take one step closer to achieving it. Whether that be making a phone call, writing an email, doing some research, or whatever. Today is the day for action so go forth and conquer.

Mentoring is certainly the buzz word at the moment.  Everywhere you turn, someone has come up with a new mentoring program that is better than the last and guarantees that your results will be amazing.  

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Hello and thanks for stopping by.

Well since this is my very first blog on my site i feel like i should be doing a little happy dance or something to celebrate the occasion, instead ill just have a little sip of my favorite drink pepsi max and that should do it.

Im all about empowering women.  I figure if what i say helps just one women then its worth it.  Obviously im hoping to assist more than that, but ill be happy to start somewhere. 

This site is very very new, so please bare with me while i get content added and things like that.  Id like this site to be the place where anyone can come and get information and support about issues that effect women and how positive changes can be made to your life.  I dont pretend to know it all.  I have read that you teach what you are meant to learn, and i guess there is probably some truth in that.  

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