Is being a leader scary? Absolutely.  Is being out front likely to subject you to criticism? You bet.  Is it going to be worth it in the long run? For sure.  If you are passionate enough to have a dream and want to take your dream to the next level, then leadership is something you have to embrace.

Now you may be thinking, i work for myself and how can i lead?  Well that’s easy.  You can certainly lead yourself.  Who better to lead than you?  You can also lead clients and customers.  Have faith in your abilities.  No one is going to hand you a golden goblet and say we drink to your brilliance.  (well that may be a little dramatic) Make the decision to lead, and others will follow you.

Most people need someone to take them to the next level.  Why not you? Why not now?

Today was one of those days for me.  I was having the most fabulous morning and after spending some time with my niece, I really was feeling inspired so i went in and pulled out some notes in my book to send to get written up.

Then a relative decided that it was important to discuss where i am at this point in time and talked about what i needed to focus on because i didn’t have a goal.  I thought that was really interesting because i have had the same goal for about 10 years.  However, if you don’t ask me what my goal is, you probably wouldnt know what it is.

I had to stop myself from second guessing myself and my choices.  It really took me looking at the situation from their angle to see why they may think that.  I didn’t take it personally, I know that not everyone ‘gets’ what i do.  My mother will never understand why i spend so much time on that stupid computer.  That’s just her though.

So i thought about it and i realised that we all get tested from time to time.  How do you know if your on the right track if someone doesn’t question you or give you the opportunity to reaffirm your path.  This doesn’t have to be a reaffirming by doing a big song and dance.  That’s not everyone’s style.  It maybe the quiet reassurance you need to give yourself that you are doing what you love and that you are where you are meant to be.

Do not take to heart every question you get, or every off handed comment, trust me, there will be many of those along your journey.  If your going to give up on your dream every time someone makes a comment, its not a very strong dream at all.

So trust yourself.  You know what is right for you. You don’t have to have the approval of the masses, you just need to have given yourself approval to believe, dream and achieve.

To your success.
K

Everyone has those days.  I’ve had one of those weeks.  I wondered when it was going to end.  It was like a bad dream i kept living over and over each day with no improvement.  Groundhog day it was not.  Then i realised that my stress level was up to me to maintain.  I was the one who had to decide if i jumped up and down and screamed, or patiently counted to 10 and wondered if in the big sceme of things, was it really worth getting upset over and would it kill me?

Some days all you can do to survive is to let it go.  Don’t hold onto it or it will bring you down. and fast.  I have really have no magic words to help you when you are feeling really shitty, it sucks i know.  But I am feeling your pain and i share it with you.  But tomorrow is a new day and all we have is right now so we might as well make the most of it.

It is at those times when you really do learn that it is all about you.  It all starts and ends with you.  You may friends who comfort you with a few kind words, but they are so caught up with their own lives that even humoring you with comfort is a challenge.

On those days it is important to not look for the higher meaning, the lesson and the higher ground.  Be sad, be sorry for yourself, drag yourself around the house, and you know why.  Because once you have moved past those feelings, you move to a better place.  You move to anger.  Not so much as anger at the world, more at anger of needing people to lean on and when they disappoint you, you decide that you can do it.  Never underestimate the power of an expremely pissed off woman.

Once you have moved past sadness, its when you start to refocus and get things done.  You decide that if it has to be done, you will do it yourself.  You know you can’t rely on anyone so you step up to the plate and make the decision to do it yourself.  And its great because thats where the power comes from.

You find strength you didnt know you had, you find ideas that you wouldnt have otherwise had, you see options that earlier were not there and you draw on a deep seated, underlying strength that only women really tap into when they get to that really pissed off place.

We are reminded that nice girls dont get angry.  Hogwash.  Get angry. Hell, get mad.  You will get more done and achieve more than ever when your in that state.  Once you do reach your goals then you can calm down and be a happy little camper again. Until then, embrace your inner anger goddess.  She was put there for a reason.  The pissed off princess can be your friend.  Embrace her and see what you can achieve.

Yesterday was one such day for me.  I was sad, i was feeling down and wondering why I do what i do.  Is there any point to it all?  Calling on friends who didnt have time because of their own priorities and challenges and i felt unloved.  So i sat and thought about it, felt sorry for myself, ate some cookies and moped around.  But today i feel fabulous.  I have achieved so much so far and that is from the inner princess who is really pissed off.  I am angry i didnt take action earlier.  I try to be nice, be there for everyone and give to everyone. But you know some days you just have to give to yourself.  Stop thinking of everyone else and think about you. Its ok.  Its allowed. We women give to everyone else and when we are exhausted and have nothing left, we wonder why we feel so empty.  Ah well thats because we are empty.  we have nothing left for ourselves.  So stop.  Make today all about you.  Give yourself permission to be selfish. Enjoy.

Now im not saying its easy to forgive and i think the biggest misconception with forgiveness is that by forgiving someone, you are not saying that what they did was ok.  You are saying that you are no longer giving that person power over you and giving them your energy.

Most people think that to forgive means to say it was ok to be hurt.  No its just the opposite.  Because what you did was not ok, i will no longer give you the hold over me by what you have done.  You release the person so that your energy is not consumed with the act.  You are free to go about your day happy, and fulfil your dreams.

You learn from those past events and it makes you a little wiser the next time that situation shows up in your life.  Because whether we like to admit it or not, holding a grudge and being angry only hurts us not anyone else.  SO forgive, release and live your best.  Success is the best revenge after all. And a savvy sassy woman of the world knows that.

What i found that was interesting is that all of these issues could easily be overcome with a couple of changes.  The first being taking complete and absolute responsibility for the situations women found themselves in.  It is only when we own our stuff can we change it.  Most women wanted more time to exercise, have down time and stress free environments.  That got me wondering about how that would be achieved.

Well one would be saying NO.  Thank you for the offer but at this time i cannot or will not take on anymore tasks or activities.  This puts you in the drivers seat of your life.  It’s about having clear and well defined boundaries.

The other thing you can do is to make a commitment that no matter what, you will do what you need to or want to do.  If you want to exercise, you make the commitment that no matter what, you will get up and go for a walk for 30 minutes each morning.  When you take the option of doing it out of the picture, it becomes something that you do not put aside.

Most women said they did not have enough time for themselves.  The interesting thing is that if a loved one got sick and these women had to take a week off work to care for their spouse, child or immediate family member, they would find the time.  Its all about the priority you place on the situation.  Exercising may not be as important to you as caring for a sick child, but if you know your health is failing and that you are getting sicker and sicker, at some point you must become the priority.

So this week, make the commitment to do 1 thing each day that gets you closer to your goal. If its losing weight. Make the commitment to exercise everyday or 1 week.  You will feel better, have more energy, be able to think clearer, and generally be more fun to be around.

Make the commitment. Stick to it. Schedule it in.  Take responsibility for your life.

Let me know how you go with it.

Well since this is my very first blog on my site i feel like i should be doing a little happy dance or something to celebrate the occasion, instead ill just have a little sip of my favorite drink pepsi max and that should do it.

Im all about empowering women.  I figure if what i say helps just one women then its worth it.  Obviously im hoping to assist more than that, but ill be happy to start somewhere. 

This site is very very new, so please bare with me while i get content added and things like that.  Id like this site to be the place where anyone can come and get information and support about issues that effect women and how positive changes can be made to your life.  I dont pretend to know it all.  I have read that you teach what you are meant to learn, and i guess there is probably some truth in that.  

Im very open to learning.  I love it.  I love books, i love to lay back and read something that helps me improve my life, or see things a different way then what i usually do.

So if you have any questions or comments, please feel free to drop me a line, or leave a comment.